I love u very much

Dear dear,

Seriously, I am scared that i am _____. I'm emotional and crazy now. I'm breaking down inside. I hope you're there to hold me together still. Tell me that i'm not, prove it to me, please dear. I want this month to pass quick, I want the prove that it's not what I think. I need the prove. Now whenever I cough my mind gives me trauma.

I miss the times when we have a pure, innocent relationship. The times before our exams ended last year. From now on, you know what i"m seeking. We're not going to instigate each other. We're going to help each other. We're going to work together. Our body is the temple of God. We're going to protect our body.

I love it when I'm close to you, and your life. I love being in your house, and watching tv on the couch, it is really blissful. I miss eating your mum's spaghetti and telling you that it's wonderful. I miss all the good times, like how we mugged at teadot. I miss your sudden crazyness when you suddenly told me you want to tell your parents about us. I miss those times too dear. I hate those times when we indulge in bad pleasures, they make me scared, they haunt me, they make me wake up many times from my sleep. They even haunt me in my dreams.

I am so afraid that whatever has happened in term1 this year would repeat itself. It is really scary. I am so scared, so cold, so alone.

I hate that feeling. I love our innocent, and carefree days.

Love,

Sarah.

Nicer

Hi dear,

This is what makes me happy lately, getting closer to you. These 2 weeks have brought me closer to you, your life in particular. Getting to know your family better makes me happy, it connects my life and your life, as one. I like it when your family recognizes me as your girlfriend, because then I am reassured of my presence in your very life. I know you're getting really PMS-y lately because of the not very distant stress, it's like a train and you're on the platform, right? It's about how, whether or not, you're going to fall on the railway, then the train aka OLVL hits you there, flat. So you're balancing your life right now, keeping it constantly stable, so you'd never fall onto the burning tracks, so you'd board the train and head towards liberation, happily and successfully. Yes I know you're stressed, that's a good thing though. It means you know your end in mind, and you're working towards the best. Well, I'd just like to let you know that this journey you're travelling, you're not alone. So at your deepest darkest moments, when you're frantic about your grades and tumbling down, do remember that I'm travelling the distance with you, your family is too. We're all next to you, catching you even if you fall. But let that not be the reason you make yourself vulnerable, let that be the reason why you strife even harder. Because I want you to succeed, because your future is mine as well, and so you have to do well, for yourself, for your family, for me, for us.

Cupid

Today was nat'l day celebration at school.

Went to school just for a formal ceremony and a concert.

Which totally made me miss Enive alot..

Then, I went to parkway with Jt and we had lots of fun talking.

Alright, then I met Ying Liang and we went to Tampines, having nothing to do.

Walked around aimlessly for awhile,

then went over to somewhere around his Grandma's for Icecream!

Had double choc! He had green tea and strawberry :)

then we went back to Tampines and searched around for sports shoes.

Yingliang needed new ones cos his old one was worn and torn.

Found cheap bargains of New Balance and Asics ...

So we went to find his mom and told her about it.

Did homework and revised at Teadot while waiting for his mum's hairdo.

After which, we had dinner with his bro and mum.

His bro rushed off for piano so his mum, him and i went to buy his pair of shoes.

Then I went home.

Going over to his place again tomorrow.

Great!

o.o

命运好幽默， 让爱的人都沉默。

Hello dear, I love the sentence above.

I promised you to blog so here I am.

I'm so glad your parents are supportive in our relationship.

But sometimes I feel as though they would rather it if we weren't together.

I hope that's not an obstacle though!

Maybe they think we're not compatible or what, so they keep demoralizing you.

In any case, I hope that their perception would take change.

I don't know why there are some things that have to be so regulated.

Maybe it's just like that. Sigh.

I feel like pretending that your parents never knew. Maybe it'd be better that way.

Just ask your bro, and go ahead with the plans.

Since you can't make time to meet me this Saturday, it's okay.

I think that I utilize my time on other measures too.

I have to admit that I was quite disappointed, but I am consoling myself.

I know I sound like a expressionistic maniac, but I can't help it.

Because I'm so restricted to feelings of being wanted and being rejected I find myself fluctuating between these two platforms and trying to get a grip but all the time failing.

Time in the past, my experiences, since I was in primary school, gave me all the nightmares of rejection and acceptance.

It is sensitive and an area that has been exposed times, again.

Life is weird isn't it? Kidding us in the most ways available. I find life peculiar too.

It plays with desires and tramples with weak spots.

I don't know if you'd really understand what i'm writing.

I just hope that your parents can see this in a more positive light.

And you would put in the share of effort to convince them, the amount of effort I have risked so many times before, to convince my parents.

God bless.

Love u.